Two years ago, I started a blog with a really silly name, and didn't even expect it to last two months. Alas, it did. And then some.
because on your baby's second birthday,
only two giant, cake-like monstrosities aka Ben's Cookies will do.
Why do I blog? By no means has this been a question that I've been asking myself only recently. It's one that I constantly ponder over, along with what am I having for my next meal? When is my next meal? When's nap time? But in a fit of deep introspection, most likely because I'm temporarily situated in a really scholarly, English town (we get it, Caroline. You're in Europe. Shut up about it.), I've given even more thought to it. Because yes, academics spend their days questioning the merits of blogging. Duh.
Why do I read blogs? This one's easy. I'm too nosy for my own good. I want to see what you eat, what you wear, who you hang out with. I'm also delusional. After a while, I think we're friends. And I like to hear my friends' thoughts and revelations, I want to hurt with you when you're sad, and celebrate with you as you reap in accomplishments and have babies and get married and get degrees. I want to be inspired by you. I want to know your story. When I'm in your hometown, or when I'm traveling somewhere that you've previously traveled to, I want to go to all the places you've talked about and experience the same delicious food and wild, crazy notions that you did.
Why do I write a blog? Now, we're treading through murkier waters. I blog for many reasons. I enjoy meeting and connecting with like-minded (and nice!) individuals, yes. I like that a 16-year-old and a 40-year-old can both read what I'm saying and understand. It helps me understand several universal truths. I like that it helps me improve my writing (actually, LOL on this one - my writing has not improved. In fact, my high school English teachers will be heartbroken to know that I write blogposts in hashtags and abbreviations way more than I should). It helps me improve my photography and get some cost-per-use out of that expensive camera, yes. But those are all cherries on top of the cake. What is the actual cake? (Carrot or red velvet, undoubtedly. Or triple chocolate.)
One of my favorite teachers of all time said something that I very much related to. She said, "I write to make sense of the world." And I think, for me, that's a huge part of it. Many moments and perplexities and concepts in this world, I simply don't get unless I put my thoughts on paper. I also blog to see how much I've grown and to assure myself that I do learn and evolve. Although my blog name implies that I don't like or don't find myself changing, I, like everyone else, am ever-evolving... I just hope that my essence and core never does. 2012 Caroline is a stranger to 2014 Caroline, and yet... they're one and the same. 2012 Caroline is like a little sister - I listen to her chatter on, and I think - wow, you're really stupid. But you're learning. It's amazing to get to witness that in myself through this blog.
The other day, I was going through and editing my Paris photos and I told my friend Lauren, "you know, it's strange to think that, barring a universal Internet wipeout or something of the like, this blog will be a very detailed account of my life for my kids and grandkids." Not only will they be able to see what I was up to back in the day, they'll be able to know my thoughts as my life happens. I'm not sharing lessons in hindsight or purely memories. I'm sharing life events and emotions and revelations as they occur to me. And that's pretty mindblowing and special to me. Because not only do my spawn get to experience my life (this is assuming they even want to know... so hey grandkids, your grandmother's a nerd. It's in the genes. Live with it.), but also if I'm blessed enough to be wrinkled and white-haired one day, I'll get to relive the highlights and the lowlights and the everydaylights again. So, come at me, Alzheimer's, I OUTSMARTED YOU.